If I Could Turn Back Time

Recently, I've been thinking of you.

I don't really understand why myself, but the feeling is really strong. I'm just overwhelmed with guilt and regret, the feeling that I should have felt half a decade ago. It was so long ago, you probably don't even remember.

If I could turn back time, I definitely would do all the right things I should have done...
I would really think and weigh all of my options before deciding on one. One that I would not regret.
But we are humans and we can only wish, and many times we dream for impossible things....

I can keep going on, but,
I am also tired of going through many many What If scenarios in my head late at night.
I do realize that I am big enough to know that I have to let go. I will try very hard to make peace with the fact that I once made a bad decision, and will be more careful in the future.

But,
If I could turn back the time, I want to apologize to you... I am very sorry.

Beautiful Words from Will & Grace

Hey all,

Just wanna stop by to say that I'm doing fine. I know that I've been quiet on my blog, including removing all of my old blogposts. I am actually doing fine, better than I thought I'd be after what happened. I now realize that, you know what, happiness starts within you. You gotta love yourself enough to know what you deserve and what deserves you - I'll make sure I dedicate a blogpost to this once I'm ready. As of now, it's enough to say that I'm okay :)

Currently, due to MCO and coronavirus pandemic, I've been working from home and mostly watching Will & Grace on my free time. Re-watching actually, I believe I've finished the whole seasons. This particular episode  (S0311: Coffee & Commitment) somehow had moved me and I just wanna keep the scene here. For future reference lol.

	Will: When I'm feeling like there's no love coming to me...
	Grace: And I have no love to give...
	Will: When I'm feeling separated from the world...
	Grace: And cut off from myself...
	Will: When I'm feeling annoyed by every little thing...
	Grace: Because I'm not getting what I want; I'll remember that there is an infinite amount of love available to me.
	Will: And I'll see it in you.
	Grace: I'll remember that I am complete within myself...
	Will: So I'll never have to look to you to complete me.
	Both: And most of all, I'll remember that everything I really need I already have, and whatever I don't have will come to me when I'm ready to receive it. --> This just gets me every time!

—reading a poem at the wedding